For men interested in finding a foreign bride, it is essential to do some basic math to see if they can truly afford to find a mail order bride. Men who will struggle with the costs usually find two problems. The first is that finding a mail order bride costs them a lot more than they realize. The second is that if they are unable to afford to travel to meet their chosen lady, then she might choose to marry another man. So it’s important to get a good idea of what it is likely to cost to find a good foreign bride.
The costs associated with finding a mail order bride can be broken down into three categories: finding a suitable lady, going to meet her, immigration costs, and ongoing costs after marriage.
Costs of Finding a Mail Order Bride
There are a wide range of online dating sites that will allow you to make contact with foreign ladies seeking Western husbands.
These sites range from being 100% free, to having a subscription or charging on a pay per use model.
Date In Asia is the most popular free Asian dating website. It’s a good place to look at if you’re interested in finding a mail order bride from China, Thailand or the Philippines. However, be aware that a free dating site won’t have such a good search engine as a paid for dating site. Free sites usually also have a very limited matchmaking capability. It’s certainly possible to find a bride on a free dating site, but you’re going to have to budget for a lot of time and effort that could be better spent on other things.
Subscription sites are often a better way of finding a foreign bride. There are a whole lot of international dating sites. For Russian ladies try a site like Russian Euro or Elena’s Models. Latin American ladies can be found on Latin American Cupid or Latin Affairs. Finally for Asian ladies try Cherry Blossoms dating or a country specific dating site like ChineseLoveLinks.
As a general rule a dating site will charge around $30 a month, or less than $200 for an annual subscription. If you can afford it then you might like to choose the annual membership plan as there is usually a big saving compared to paying on a month by month basis.
Just be aware that some sites are free to join but you pay for them on a pay per use basis. Many of the Russian and Asian dating sites use this model. A prime example is Chnlove. This Chinese dating site charges you each time you send or receive a letter from a lady on the site. The costs include a translator fee which allows you to communicate with Chinese mail order brides who don’t speak or write much English. The downside is that the costs of using this type of site can very quickly escalate, and it’s not unusual to come across men who have spent more than $1000 on a foreign ladies letter writing site of this type.
Other sites might also charge you for receiving an email address of a lady so that you can email her. Typically these charge at least $10 an address. This type of site can be better value than the letter writing site. But bear in mind that on a subscription site like Russian Euro you can chat to an unlimited number of ladies for less than around $30 a month.
By the way, dating sites try to make extra money for charging for other services. Stay well away from any site that charges for video or webcam chat on a pay per minute basis. And it’s not really worth bothering to send gifts of chocolates and teddy bears through a dating site – the prices are often inflated and it’s best not to get a lady hooked onto the idea of you sending her gifts – that’s the slippery slope to mailing her thousands of dollars via Western Union.
Instead of a dating site you might like to go down the introduction agency route. Some marriage agencies charge a flat rate fee for helping you find a mail order bride. Such agencies are particularly common in Thailand, and are a good choice for an older gentleman seeking a mature Thai bride. Check prices before you sign up to a marriage agency.
Meeting a Foreign Lady
Having found a lady then it’s time to go and meet her in her own country.
First a warning – if a lady wants to meet you in your own country, then she’s probably a money scammer. In general it’s not possible for a Russian or Asian lady to get a visa to travel to the USA or much of Western Europe. Exceptions are ladies from advanced economies (Japan and maybe South Korea), or wealthy businesswomen who have traveled extensively overseas before. These ladies are quite common on Chinese dating sites, but by and large Western men tend to go for the less well off foreign ladies who would never qualify for a travel visa.
Most countries men seek mail order brides from are fairly cheap to visit after you’ve found a good priced air fare. One tip is to be careful as to where you choose a lady, because if it turns out it will cost a lot of money to visit her then you might regret talking to her in the first place. So before you fall in love with that beautiful foreign lady, do a bit of research on a travel website to see if it’s economical to visit her. In particular I found that some Chinese cities are much more expensive to visit than others.
For Asia it’s best to stick to ladies in Cebu and Manila (Philippines), Bangkok (Thailand) and the Chinese coastal cities (Guangzhou and Shenzhen are particularly good due to the close proximity of Hong Kong’s international airport).
For Russia and Eastern Europe it’s often best to stick to major cities that have frequent connecting flights from Western Europe.
Good flight and hotel packages can be found on Expedia or other travel websites. Play around with your travel dates because some times are much cheaper than others. In general it’s cheaper to fly during the week, and away from major public vacations.
If you want to stay for more than a couple of weeks then it may be worth looking for a serviced apartment.
Factor in the cost of taking a small laptop or netbook with you – then you can use the Internet to check dating sites for local ladies should the lady you visit not be suitable for you. Although men are generally more successful if they focus their attention on one lady, it’s always a good idea to have some reserve ladies you could visit should there be no chemistry between you and the original lady you planned to visit. Also remember that ladies are human, and sometimes they change their mind and don’t want to meet you.
To help calculate costs, from my own experiences you need to visit a lady for at least a fortnight. If things go well then you could get engaged on your first visit. A better option if you can spare the cost is to return to your country to think about things, then arrange another trip 3-4 months down the line. It’s easier to think in your own country. Just be aware though that ladies (particularly Asian ladies) will probably not commit to you unless you get engaged to her and meet her parents.
Costs of Immigration
Visa costs are often modest. As far as visas go, you can generally get your bride over to your country on a fiancÃ© visa and marry her in your country. Or marry her first in her country, then get her over on a marriage settlement visa. Visa costs are usually fairly modest. Costs may escalate if the lady’s circumstances are out of the ordinary, or you want her children from a previous marriage to come and live with you. To avoid unnecessary time delays it’s usually a good idea to employ the services of an immigration lawyer.
Ongoing Costs of Supporting Your New Bride
Don’t spend all your money in the search for your foreign wife. Immigration authorities will want to know that you have enough money to support your new bride after marriage. In some cases ladies brought over on fiancÃ© visas are not legally allowed to work, so you need to demonstrate that your income is enough to support her.
Generally speaking, ladies like men with money. One of the biggest reasons for divorce between a man and his new mail order bride is that he doesn’t have enough money to support her. Take this as a warning.
Some ladies just want to be housewives, while other ladies will get bored being at home all day and will want a career of their own. Bear in mind that many ladies don’t realize that their poor English and lack of internationally recognized qualifications might mean that they won’t be able to resume their original career in your country. Avoid this issue by only dating ladies who show signs of being able to speak and write English, and avoid professional ladies with careers that would be very difficult to restart in a Western country (health care is one such example).
So hopefully this has given you an idea of how much a mail order bride will cost you. It’s not the cheap option for finding a bride, but many men have found everlasting love with the foreign bride of their dreams. Do the math, and see if you can join them.